This Past Year

Another school year has ended...

And this as the years before I have learned many things
Nothing in life is simple
we should all know that by now
But for me everything is hard

Next year there I will be attending my senior year
also it will be my final year
Before I can enjoy true freedom from school
I must first focus on the final exam next year

This exam will be the one that will
decide my future
So I can no longer play around
I must make sure I am ready
but right now I feel like a stupid Bastard
I haven't been serious this past year

I don't know what to do...
I want to study this school holiday
It just I can't focus
I don't even know why I am learning
so many meaningless things
In my future will I use the knowledge I have learn
and the knowledge I am about to learn?

Someone once told me
"It is useless learning about the things that you're
not gonna use in the future.
Remember this world is only for awhile,
So why waste your time learning about the things your not gonna use?
What will you obtain with nothing?
Think about it..."

That person said those words to me exactly one year before
It took me at least a month to find my answer
and I thought I found it when I first entered my new school
but as time passed I knew I had pick the wrong answer
I don't regret my choice

Why?
Because I met someone this year
She is all I ever think about right now
She gave me strength to keep moving and look towards the future
We are very close friends right now
And now I longer get to see her...
I only see her at school
but it has ended already.
I don't even know if we'll attend the same school next year
She told me to think positive
So I will try
I thank you my most precious friend
for always being there when I need you

Though she is quite popular among the guys at our school
and also has many admirers
she is kind to all
and I know she sometime suffers the same pain I do
she will always stay true and pure to those around her

Unlike me I am a Damned Bastard
who knows nothing but failure
That is why I'll never be fit for her...
Haha... I really am stupid

There is only one thing I want to say to her which is
Aishiteru yo

I will look towards the future now
for my reality is mine alone
only I can shape my own future
My Resolution for the next year is set

I just hope I'll be able to live that long

This ends my letter...

One more chance just until my dreams come true...

Nothing is going the way it should
I hastily subdue these feelings of impatience
All this anxiety and nervousness is sending my heart into disorder
Just a boy hugging his knees in the midst of it all

Shivering and in tears, I repress all my regret
I cried all night, but now it seems dawn is breaking...

So, undoubtedly you're right
Even though right now I may try to turn back
And I keep on being stubborn about it, though I know it's monotonous
I'll start walking again, this time even farther, and I won't give up

I'll keep it all locked away in my heart

Until my dreams come true...

I surrendered myself to a dismal emptiness
in the most critical of times
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't quite reach
Aiming for the shore
I had to swim for my life

Withstanding the current, I can't even raise my voice
It could have been the end right there, but...

I don't think that love can save everything,
but there's something about your smile
that somehow healed my heart, and in your lips
I found the strength to stand up again

If only I could get just one more chance...

The flow of the river is intense even today
But I won't let go of your hand
I'll believe in the love that's in my heart forever

Until my dreams come true...

I don't think that love can save everything,
but there's something about your smile
that somehow healed my heart, and in your lips
I found the strength to stand up again

If only I could get just one more chance...

The flow of the river is intense even today
But I won't let go of your hand
I'll believe in the love that's in my heart forever

Until my dreams come true...

All I ever Dream

Because of you I'm lying awake at night

All I'm seeing is pictures of you

As I close my eyes

I fade my way into the laws of my dream world

It's a place of trust

Will you meet me there?

There's no time to spare

Come on show me you care

Here we can make anything become real

All of my dreams are all I see

Try not to wake, me can't you see

All of my dreams are all I wanna see

Try not to wake me

Because of you my tries to not think of you

They just end up in one million thoughts

It's way too much to mention

See what I mean, when you see my creation

To the Promised Land

I can meet you there

There's no time to spare

Come on show me you care

What you believe in will here become real

Trapped inside my own dreams

I'm not complaining

Leave behind a lie of any kind

Here it can disappear

My Nightmares

A Reunion

It has been a while since we last met

right?

Well it will all end tomorrow,

Tomorrow will be the day we meet

after almost seven month apart

I hope and pray that all of us

will attend tomorrow's gathering

They told me they wanted to do a pot luck

so that means

everybody must bring something to eat

it doesn't matter how much or

what it is

it the thought that counts right?

Don't know what else to write down on this empty blog

so I guess I'll have to end it here...

Remember tomorrow we meet

make memories

have fun

and

Be ourself...

So until next time